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It's OK To Complain

I hope you are all doing well, holding steady, through our currently chaotic world. You’re always in Mark’s and my best thoughts.

I got an email this morning from a person just complaining about all manner of their concerns. After each new complaint, they apologized for complaining. They were just trying to be considerate and not bum me out.

I appreciated that but told them that I don’t get bummed out when most people complain because I think it’s healthier to get it out than keep it bottled up inside.

My background is as a psychiatric social worker and I worked for many years as a therapist. My clients taught me more than I ever learned in school. Certainly, getting things out in the open emotionally was a hallmark of my practice.

So, here we all are today facing some horrific challenges and uncertainty and complaining can seem like an indulgence we can little afford. Why make it worse by complaining, you know?

I mean, we all face an uncertain future, our government is floundering in attempts to help us, some of us have friends or relatives with covid, we’re worried about our kids along with our financial futures. We miss one another and life as we knew it.

Our worries and concerns have magnified exponentially in 2020. Those concerns are legitimate and overwhelming and we’re all in the same or similar boats. So, what if anything, (aside from waiting for life to improve) can we do to feel better? Well, we can complain.

Yeah, I’m actually suggesting that you consider complaining to someone who will listen to you and give you some support. In many cases, that will be all it takes to ward off depression and return to feeling some sense of hope. Sometimes you just need “to get it out”.

While certainly it doesn’t make all people feel better to complain, I surely think it can help a lot of us. If you’re feeling really frustrated or down, maybe try and make an agreement with a close friend that you’ll swap times to complain. If you encapsulate complaining, put some parameters around its’ frequency, it might do you some good in these difficult times.

As always, Mark and I have you in our best thoughts for continued well being.

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